Saturday, September 10, 2011

I Miss Me

While I love being able to stay home to be with my children when they are small I miss working. I miss the daily interaction with people who are not my family members. I miss the opportunity to be told what a great job I do every day. I miss getting dressed, doing my hair, and feeling confident. I have lost all of this by staying home. I am not one who likes to have to try to find play groups or what not because I always feel judged in those situations. I am afraid one of my kids will be to rough or make too big a mess. Because of this I stay home and don't take them out and about to meet people. This makes for a really lonely life. The other thing that drives me crazy is not being able to depend on The Man's work schedule. I knew marrying him life wouldn't be easy because of the military but I really never knew it would be as difficult as it is. It seems that every time I plan something he has to work or cannot take leave. I am just venting because I had made plans for myself and for the family this weekend and once again his work schedule messed it all up. I am stuck here sitting at home fuming with a ruined weekend on my hands. I miss the time when I was an employee and had more time for myself.

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